Well, let’s be honest…picking a good kicker is a dart throw more than anything. The good news is I’m awesome at picking ones that do lousy, haha! Besides, I just want to play this cool video below.

Chris Boswell
Boswell is a good kicker, but he plays in a difficult stadium. Heinz Field is notorious for being one of the toughest field to kick with the outdoor elements, notably the swirling wind in December. When all else fails, pick a kicker in a dome or at least in a warm weather city so the ball goes further. The exception to the the rule is Denver, where the ball flies easily in the thin mountain air.

Zane Gonzalez
The Dolphins a re a work in progress. I have zero confidence in Malik Willis behind a shaky line. In addition, their defense is also in a rebuild mode. I don’t expect them to be in close games. I’m fading Miami and Gonzalez in 2026.

Andre Szmyt|
Szmyt?? I can’t even say his name. How the hell am I supposed to suggest him? I’m going the be the guy who tries to pronounce TJ Houshmandzadeh, haha! Szmyt championship, haha!

Jake Moody
Jake had a stellar career for the Wolverines in College, but has struggled in his brief NFL careeer. Maybe he turns it around, but I’m fading until I see some improvement.

Jake Elliott
I actually like Elliott. I think he’s a pretty reliable kicker. Unfortunately, the Eagles go for so many fourth downs with that damn tush push, that he’s on my do not draft list. That drives me nuts when I have a kicker and he loses opportunities.

Readers, “Ringo, you miserable slug! You think you can talk your way out of this. We trusted you. Your picks were horrible! You betrayed us!”

Me, “No, I didn’t. Honest, I ran out of gas. I had a flat tire. I didn’t have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn’t come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts!!! It wasn’t my fault. I swear to God!!!” Haha!!!