Well, let’s be honest…picking a good kicker is a dart throw more than anything. The good news is I’m awesome at picking ones that do lousy, haha! Besides, I just want to play this cool video below.

Tyler Loop
Loop has struggled mightily in the preseason. There;s a good chance the Ravens cut him before week 1. Even if they don’t, it might just be a matter of time if Loop has the yips. But if makes one, it’s time for the Loopy dance, haha!

Chris Boswell
Boswell is a good kicker, but he plays in a difficult stadium. Heinz Field is notorious for being one of the toughest field to kick with the outdoor elements, notably the swirling wind in December. Boswell by name. Bos-very-well by reputation, haha!

Andre Szmyt|
Szmyt?? I can’t even say his name. How the hell am I supposed to suggest him? I’m going to sound like the guy who tries to pronounce TJ Houshmandzadeh, haha! Szmyt championship, haha!

Trey Smack
Honestly, I have no idea if Trey Smack is good or not. He plays for the Packers. They should put up some points. That said, kicking in Green Bay is less than ideal in December. All I know is if you want to talk some Smack, Trey is the guy, haha!

Jake Elliott
I actually like Elliott. I think he’s a pretty reliable kicker. Unfortunately, the Eagles go for so many fourth downs with that damn tush push, that he’s on my do not draft list. That drives me nuts when I have a kicker and he loses opportunities.

Readers, “Ringo, you miserable slug! You think you can talk your way out of this. We trusted you. Your picks were horrible! You betrayed us!”

Me, “No, I didn’t. Honest, I ran out of gas. I had a flat tire. I didn’t have enough money for cab fare. My tux didn’t come back from the cleaners. An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts!!! It wasn’t my fault. I swear to God!!!” Haha!!!